PTSD – Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, otherwise known as Shell Shock, or Battle Fatigue, is not new, for much of the last century, only Soldiers who had seen battle were seen as having PTSD, and no one else was recognized to getting or suffering from it.
PTSD can come and go in ebbs and flows.
According to the mayoclinic.org these are the symptoms of PTSD
Recurrent, unwanted distressing memories of the traumatic event
Reliving the traumatic event as if it were happening again (flashbacks)
Upsetting dreams or nightmares about the traumatic event
Severe emotional distress or physical reactions to something that reminds you of the traumatic event
Symptoms of avoidance may include:
- Trying to avoid thinking or talking about the traumatic event
- Avoiding places, activities or people that remind you of the traumatic event
Negative changes in thinking and mood
Symptoms of negative changes in thinking and mood may include:
- Negative thoughts about yourself, other people or the world
- Hopelessness about the future
- Memory problems, including not remembering important aspects of the traumatic event
- Difficulty maintaining close relationships
- Feeling detached from family and friends
- Lack of interest in activities you once enjoyed
- Difficulty experiencing positive emotions
- Feeling emotionally numb
Changes in physical and emotional reactions
Symptoms of changes in physical and emotional reactions (also called arousal symptoms) may include:
- Being easily startled or frightened
- Always being on guard for danger
- Self-destructive behavior, such as drinking too much or driving too fast
- Trouble sleeping
- Trouble concentrating
- Irritability, angry outbursts or aggressive behavior
- Overwhelming guilt or shame
What does PTSD feel like? I have had more people ask me this question, especially now, in light of how we are living, working and functioning under Covid-19, and at first, I couldn’t figure out why, but now, I get it. I have been through all this, and I know exactly how it feels, how to work through it, and overcome it.
PTSD is different for everyone, and there is no one way it makes you feel.
The only way I can describe it, is that you feel like the real you, the one that you know you are, is locked up somewhere watching the PTSD take over.
Every time I got angry or upset, I felt this surge, like someone else was taking over my body, it was the PTSD, and there was a little voice in the back of my mind, like a faint echo, shouting “stop”.
PTSD gets louder and louder, and takes over. It brings out every fear, every bit of anxiety, every panic, every bit of confidence, every horrible emotion you can think of. It makes you itchy, nervous, and your body reacts to it.
PTSD brings on depression, anxiety, panic attacks, but the worst, is not being able to slay it, because you don’t have the tools to. It is exhausting, takes every bit of energy, and takes away your light.
There are lots of things you can do to work through it. Check out this space tomorrow.